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Do you want to know how to prepare your family dog for the arrival of a new baby? Would you like your dog to be well-behaved around your grandchildren or the neighbor’s kids? Are you thinking about buying a dog but concerned about the safety of your children? Parents who read and follow Rafe’s advice will be infinitely more successful in raising children and dogs together. Learn how to establish dominance, understand your dog’s way of thinking, adequately prepare a dog for a new child, how your personality affects your dog’s behavior, and the key things every child needs to be taught about dogs. Make sure children are safe around your dog. Order a copy today!
AUTHOR’S COMMENTS
If you are a dog owner who is planning a family, is an expectant parent or has just brought home a new baby or adopted child, you probably have concerns about how your dog will respond to the new addition. If your family situation has changed in any other way that involves bringing dogs and children together, you may also have concerns, and for good reason: more than two million children are bitten by dogs each year. Most of these bites take place in the children’s own homes.
Should you get rid of your dogs? With proper understanding of canine behavior and adequate preparation, most of these tragic situations can be prevented. If you are a dog owner with concerns about keeping your dog because of children, grandchildren or your friend’s children, rest assured—you can teach your dog not only to accept children, but also to behave in a safe and consistent manner around them. Do not, however, expect it to happen automatically. It requires socializing and conditioning your dog, and even examining your own relationship with him.
In this book I share observations on the effect that owners’ personalities have on a dog’s behavior. I will teach you how to use a dog’s own signals (body language) to establish and maintain leadership. I will explain how proven principles of behavior, and mold your dog into a safe companion. Together, these techniques will help adults raise children and dogs together successfully.
The guidance contained in this book is intended for most dogs and their owners and should be followed in its entirety. Since dog behavior is subject to many variables beyond the scope of this book, the publishing of this book must not be considered an assumption of liability by the author, publisher or artist. However, if you follow the guidance herein, you can expect things to go much more smoothly when “Bowser meets Baby.”
AUTHOR’S BIO
Stephen C. Rafe is the founder of Starfire, an organization that has specialized in the study and teaching of behavior-based communications in animals and humans since 1982. He has extensive practical background in the psychology of verbal and non-verbal communication, having studied this subject at both the undergraduate and graduate levels. Since 1982, he has received referrals from some 200 veterinarians to assist owners whose dogs have had behavior problems.
Steve is a former member of Animal Behavior Society and the Dog Writers’ Association of America. He received a Bachelor of Science degree from Monmouth University, and a Master of Science degree from Marymount University and is currently a doctoral candidate at the University of Phoenix. A specialist in learning theory and nonverbal communication, Steve has also studied the behavioral science of neurolinguistics at the master-practitioner level and has pursued independent research and study in behavior and psychology at the post-graduate level.
He has published more than 300 by-lined articles in major national and international publications for dog owners, professional trainers, and canine behaviorists. These include: The AKC Gazette, AKC Afield, Animal Behavior Consultant Newsletter, Capers—Canine Behavior Newsletter, Dog World, Dog Fancy, Dogs of Canada, Off-Lead, Kennel Doctor, several outdoors and sporting publications, and numerous national breed publications. He has been a contributing editor (dog behavior and training) for Quail Unlimited magazine for several years.
His book Training Your Dog for Birdwork (Denlinger’s Publishers, 1988), was nominated as 1988 Training Book of the Year by the Dog Writers’ Association of America and is now in its fourth printing, He is also the author of numerous pamphlets and manuals on canine behavior and training throughout the United States, in Canada, and in South America—including a week-long program for the largest dog-training club in Venezuela. He has also designed and conducted canine-behavior seminars for shelter personnel and volunteers, and for dog owners with children. The latter were sponsored by St. Hubert’s Giralda and a regional office of the Humane Society of the United States.
REVIEWS
"Every dog owner should read this book, but if you have or expect to have children or grand children, this book's preventative wisdom is as necessary as fire insurance." (Richard K. Lore, Ph.d., Professor of Psychology, Rutgers University)
"Your Baby and Bowser tells expectant parents how to help the family dog adapt to the myriad changes soon to come. Stephen Rafe explains why punishment does not work and how to ensure that the dog associates positive experiences with the baby. The book focuses on the welfare of both baby and dog, but Mr, Rafe gives frank advice to owners whose dog is just too dangerous. Your Baby and Bowser provides essential information to help expectant parents prepare the family dog for the new arrival and to keep both baby and Bowser safe and happy." (Joan Orr M. Sc., co-founder of the non-profit Doggone Safe for bite prevention education.)
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Foreword
Preface
PART I - When Bowser Meets Baby
Planning a Successful Introduction
Joy or Disaster? It’s Up to You
Always Prepare in Advance
Socializing Bowser
Understanding Bowser’s Personality
Your Personality Affects Bowser’s Behavior
Bowser Learns How to Investigate Baby
Bowser Learns to Walk with Baby
Bowser Learns That Babies Cry
Welcoming Baby
Make Baby a Safe Place
Use a Screen Door to Isolate the Baby
Shhhh. Baby’s Sleeping
When Baby Cries
Safeguarding Baby
When Baby Is Eating
Teach Bowser Not to Guard His Food
When Baby Starts to Crawl
When Bowser “Guards”
When Bowser Overprotects
Baby’s Bed Is Not Bowser’s Den
What Not to Do When Bowser Misbehaves
Toddlers and Dogs
Never Alone
Fringe Benefits
Bowser as Victim
Don’t Get a Dog “for Baby”
A Word About Dogs That Bite
PART II - Bowser’s Basic Training
Modify behavior, teach manners, and resolve problem
Who’s in Charge?
Controlling Behavior with Rapport Skills™
Teaching the Basics
Behavioral Teaching Techniques
The Shy or Timid Dog
Why Punishment Doesn’t Work
Is Punishment Ever Effective?
A Better Way
Correcting Minor Problems
About the Author
EXCERPT
Joy or Disaster?
It’s Up to You
Bringing the family dog and a new baby, or a new dog and young children, together for the first time can be traumatic for all concerned, or it can be a joy. Many dog owners are anxious during these circumstances. The concerns are justified! For one thing, the family dog has defined the home as his territory to be protected from all intruders. For another, most dogs are naturally concerned about anything that squeals or wiggles. At the extreme, if left untrained and unchecked, a dog might regard an infant as an animal to be killed, as a rag doll toy to be played with (which could be fatal), or as a helpless puppy that the dog may try to pick up by the neck (which could kill a baby).
We do not mean to be alarmists, but this concern has been expressed in many books on animal behavior. Dr. Michael W. Fox, Director of the Institute for the Study of Animal Problems of The Humane Society of the U.S., in his book, Understanding Your Dog, (Bantam Books, NY, 1981 ed.), discusses prey chasing behavior as part of the hunting reflex—especially in sporting breeds of dogs. He says, “And so the dog, having chased the ‘prey,’ has to bite and kill it.” He refers to mailmen and children, but the same holds true for infants since dogs do not discriminate unless they are properly taught.
Most owners wait until the baby arrives or a new dog has been acquired and then bring Mommy, Daddy, Baby and Bowser together in a calm, quiet environment. They allow Bowser to sniff while the parents hold the newcomer and pet Bowser gently. They might repeat the procedure a few times, and that’s it.
Always Prepare in Advance
These steps are fine, but most dog owners will want to do more—and they should. The first step to introducing the family dog to a new baby (or newly adopted youngster, for that matter) should begin months before the child’s actual arrival. It begins with making sure that your dog is properly trained and socialized. Parents must learn to read their dog’s signals and evaluate the ways that their own personality and family dynamics affect the dog’s behavior.
For this program to work well, both parents must have a positive rapport with the dog, and the dog should perceive them as leaders. In a family where people are either overly coddling or overly disciplinarian, the dog could become a problem. For example, he might be too dominant, spoiled, or insecure to accept the baby. We’ll start there, then proceed to making the actual introductions, and finally, we will deal with training basic commands and dealing common problems that can occur when children and dogs share the same household.
There should be no rough play with the dog. It encourages rough play with the child. Also, there should be no yelling or hitting among people in the house. Dogs copy human behavior: like children, they learn from what they observe.
A dog that is overly possessive can also be a problem, especially when a child is in the toddler stage and may interfere with the dog's meal or try to take a toy from him.
Socializing Bowser
If your dog is not already obedience trained, that is the place to begin. At the very least, he should know such commands as sit, down, heel, come, no or leave it, and enough.
“Leave it” tells him not to touch. "Enough" tells him to stop doing something, such as barking, nudging, and so on. Also, be sure to say "Off," not "Down," when you intend it to mean something like "Get off me" or "Get off the furniture." Use "Down" only to mean "Lie down."
Never use your dog's name in a scolding way. Otherwise he will learn to associate his name with negative experiences and may avoid you when he hears it.
Allow your dog to be around people as much as possible, but do not overindulge him with excessive petting. He needs to learn how to be with people and yet be left alone without nudging, pawing, or vocalizing for attention. Take him to a wide variety of places. Playgrounds, parks, school yards, shopping centers, office parks, and the like provide experiences that will help your dog accept anything new—even a baby. At first, stay far away from people when you visit each location. Gradually, over several visits, start walking him closer to people and other animals.
Keep your dog on a loose leash during each outing, and always take him through his obedience commands while at each new location. Teach him that he must sit to "say hello" to people. Begin with introducing your dog to adults, and eventually teach him to always sit before children are allowed to pet him.
Expect good behavior from Bowser at all times and you will be more likely to get it. Praise his positive responses when they occur and he will be more inclined to repeat them.
Practice the following exercise with adults before you expose your dog to children. Tell the dog to “Sit.” If he does, allow the person to pet him as you say "Good sit." If he doesn't sit, or tries to jump up, say "Off" and immediately snap the leash back to keep the dog from making contact with the person. Heel the dog away. Keep him walking in the other direction for at least ten seconds. Then return and try again. Do this no more than three times in a row, and allow at least fifteen minutes between sessions.
If the dog doesn't seem to be learning to sit to be petted on command within a reasonable number of attempts, consult a qualified obedience trainer or behaviorist for help. It is essential that you have this kind of control before you bring home a new baby.
Introducing Toddlers
When you are ready to work with your dog around young children, at first introduce him to them outside the home—away from his own territory. Again, always keep your dog on a leash. Neutral areas such as a park are good locations for doing this. Once you are certain Bowser will behave properly around young children away from your property, allow him to greet youngsters at your property. Once that is successful, do the same inside the house.
A dog that is socialized to a wide variety of people, locations and experiences will be more likely to accept your new baby successfully.
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